distraction
3rd grade
friend: *whispering* if you're stupid say "what"
me: what
friend: OH MAN
OH
OH DEAR FUCKING CHRIST
I GOT YOU SO GOOD, THAT WAS AWESOME
SWEET, SWEET DICKS IN MY MOUTH. I HAVE NEVER LAUGHED THIS HARD. EVER.
JESUS. JESUS HELP ME.

joshpeck:

i’m honestly one of those people that are just there like yeah i have friends and people talk to me but i’m nobody’s favorite person and nobody looks forward to talking to me everyday or anything and it sucks

billy-pilgrims:

[writes paper] this doesnt make any sense [prints it] [doesn’t proofread] [hands it in for a grade]

mom: don't eat the cookies yet, they just came out of the oven and are too hot
me: fire cannot kill a dragon
ryanvallejo:

ayy
motionjessinwhite:

if I don’t reblog this assume I’m dead

motionjessinwhite:

if I don’t reblog this assume I’m dead

Do you mind? Not at all.

anniephantom:

HELP

image

I MADE HANDSOME SQUIDWARD 

HE SURPASSES MORTAL BEAUTY

image

FUCK

image

HIS EYES ARE BEACONS TO A BETTER LIFE

NOW HE’S PICNICKING ALONE 

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HE LOOKS SO SAD YET SO MAJESTIC

nyctaeus:

Chemical Interactions by Daisuke Yokota

vaginawoolf:

steal her look: spooky pumpkin:

  • gucci women’s black stretch suede legging $1850
  • saint laurent classic turtleneck sweater in black cashmere with black suede elbow patches $1490
  • pumpkin $3
zzazu:

this photo makes me feel like someone traveled to an alternate dimension and brought back something that shouldnt exist

zzazu:

this photo makes me feel like someone traveled to an alternate dimension and brought back something that shouldnt exist

me: *buys merch intended for males because all the female merch is ugly as hell*

foxzes:

fakethistoyourgrave:

What’s the word for horny but not in a sexual way like I’m horny for Halloween but I don’t wanna fuck a pumpkin you feel

do u mean excited